Ohgod, those last couple of posts are nothing short of embarrassing to read. Sometimes I cry when I drink; it's always been that way, probably will continue to be so. Perhaps I need a label to notate drunken posts. Yes, I think I do.
It's so funny/sad, though. I don't hate my life. I do like who I am.
I'm bored with my life right now. So bored. So... unchallenged. This is when I slack off. But this is when I should be standing up and getting on with it. And that's what I will do.
Crying won't fix anything. There's no deep mysteries to solve anymore. I am me now, it's time to move on to the next stage.
Ah, the next stage. What does that entail? Well, at this point, there are a lot of unanswered questions. Where will I work? Where will I live? What will I drive? (I have to turn in my lease in Feb2010) How will I pay for what I will drive? Will I get a dog? A boyfriend? How will I make friends? Will I get two jobs at first and concentrate on paying down some of this debt?
There's a lot of 'wait and see' again. I'm okay with wait and see but I need to stop lazing around and expecting my life to be gifted to me. I want to control who I am and what I do so I need to control where I go and how I get there. It's time to get up now, me. Get up.
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